Wednesday, November 27, 2013


 Lessons from Home 

            Four and a half weeks ago, my sweet daddy had a flare up of his congestive heart failure and was taken to the hospital in the middle of the night.  That led to a three week stay between the hospital and a skilled care facility to get strong enough to come home.  I kept asking if I needed to come home, but my mama said she would need more help when she brought him home.  So I waited. 

            I’ve been at home with them almost two weeks now.  I count it a blessing to be able to take the days off work and for my own family understanding that I’m needed here for a couple of weeks.  I thought I’d share a few lessons from home as an adult child helping out the parents.

 1.   There is no schedule.  Well, I guess there are points in the day that have a schedule.  We know when the various therapists are coming in, but that’s about it.  When we were growing up, daddy had to get up at 4:30 a.m. to go to work, so we were in bed or close to it at 9:00 p.m.  Since no one has to get up at a certain time now, it may be midnight or after before the parents go to bed.  Of course, if the therapist is coming in the morning, there may or may not be sleeping in.  You want to know when meals are served?  Whenever.  They make up names for the times that meals are served.  They’ve always called the midday meal dinner and the evening meal supper.  There is now a dupper.  It’s kind of like brunch since it combines two meals, but it’s around 3:00 or so.  Retired people have a relaxed time schedule.  This girl who lives by a schedule has had to learn to just go with the flow.  

2.  Staying up late makes us all a little silly.  We get tickled at the silliest things, and when mom and I both start laughing, we BOTH snort!  Of course, that makes us laugh even harder.

3.  Be careful.  I’ve been running errands for mom and dad just about every day.  Every time I leave, they both tell me, “Be careful.”  Dad said something about always telling me that, but I said, “I have a 16-year-old who drives now.  I get it.  You can tell me to be careful all you want.” 

4.  Love is in the air.  My dad is 83 and my mom is 71.  They have been married for 52 years.  They still look at each other and say, “I love you” many times throughout the day. 

5.  All Wal-mart stores are not created equal.  I know this isn’t really a “home” lesson, but I have been in 3 different large Wal-mart stores and 3 Neighborhood Markets.  They are not all laid out the same. 

6.  Shopping is harder than it looks.  I am a people pleaser.  I want to make sure people are happy, and that includes buying the right things on my mom’s list.  That may mean 10 phone calls before I leave a store, but I’d rather go to another of the many Wal-mart stores to get the right thing instead of getting the wrong brand or wrong size. 

7.  Criminals are stupid.  Again, this isn’t a home lesson, but my dad and I have watched many episodes of the show “Cops.”  After one lady was told she was under arrest, she asked, “Do I have to go to jail?”  Um. Yes.  Another lady asked if they could go get a slushy on their way to jail because she was thirsty.  Um.  No.  My favorite, though, was when one guy had a medicine bottle with a lid that didn’t fit, and he said, “Someone must have come in and changed all my medicine lids!”  Um. Stupid.

8.  God has blessed me!  Now this isn’t really a new lesson, but being with my parents for the last two weeks has just deepened that lesson.  First, I’m blessed with a husband and two children who miss me but understand that I need to be here.  We’ve talked every day, texted too many times to count, and we’ve even skyped a couple of times so I can see their precious faces.  Second, I’ve been blessed with this time with my parents.  I see the strength that my mom has.  I do not know how she does all she does on her own.  But she never complains.  She always smiles.  She always gives.  I see how both of my parents still rely on God.  Dad can’t see as well as he used to when he read his Bible through every year.  But now he listens to it on his iPad.  (King James Version with a British accent isn’t so bad!)  Their Godly heritage has been passed to their children and their grandchildren.

I realize that not everyone is as fortunate as I am to have such Godly parents, and that saddens me.  However, if you are fortunate enough to still have your parents, stop what you’re doing and call them.  Just let them know you’re thinking about them and love them.  I may never get a chance to be home with my parents by myself again for this length of time.  But I will always remember these two weeks and the sweet parents God has given me.